I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
This is a rough morning for me
No, rough is puking in your froyo cup next to a five year old and her grandma.
I feel like the way dolphins mate would be the approach that a guy would have to use in order for you to sleep with them
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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