Having a random hookup so left but love u
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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