I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize