Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
I enjoy the company of your penis
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
