You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
third nipple confirmed
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
where are my pants?
in the oven.
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