sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
In case you were wondering, you weren't dreaming. I really did get stuck between my bed and the wall last night.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
Randomize
