Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
When cunnilingus is one of the first 25 words you say to someone there's a problem
#reasonsyoushouldnthaveatinder
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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