Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(954): View more from Florida

Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...

(1-954): View more from Florida

Is this the gay conversation?

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(954): Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me... (1-954): Is this the gay conversation? http://tfl.nu/4777

Replies (3) Good night (1056) Bad night (1909)
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(609): View more from New Jersey

no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.

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(609): no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical. http://tfl.nu/1fef

Replies (11) Good night (1089) Bad night (4061)
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(415): View more from California

The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?

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(415): The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish? http://tfl.nu/s0dr

Replies (10) Good night (889) Bad night (4130)
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(917): View more from New York City

Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.

(347): View more from New York

I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.

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(917): Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement. (347): I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy. http://tfl.nu/2bcu

Replies (14) Good night (1228) Bad night (4963)
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(519): View more from Ontario

You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now

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(519): You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now http://tfl.nu/uorn

Replies (9) Good night (1070) Bad night (3646)
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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.

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(978): i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies. http://tfl.nu/qg5x

Replies (10) Good night (4660) Bad night (1780)
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(317): View more from Indiana

They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me.

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(317): They're taking me to ER. Mistasnkingly. Come get me. http://tfl.nu/zjv5

Replies (4) Good night (2220) Bad night (1068)
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(330): View more from Ohio

I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter

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(330): I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter http://tfl.nu/ep47

Replies (7) Good night (3310) Bad night (1128)
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(208): View more from Idaho

Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.

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(208): Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon. http://tfl.nu/yvgl

Replies (6) Good night (1633) Bad night (663)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....

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(215): Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there..... http://tfl.nu/ckkf

Replies (18) Good night (870) Bad night (2662)
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(650): View more from California

Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.

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(650): Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some. http://tfl.nu/6y08

Replies (5) Good night (1785) Bad night (545)
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(760): View more from California

Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.

(818): View more from California

That was one of the best texts I got today

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(760): Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner. (818): That was one of the best texts I got today http://tfl.nu/vb5p

Replies (7) Good night (1796) Bad night (439)
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(925): View more from California

I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great

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(925): I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great http://tfl.nu/slai

Replies (1) Good night (707) Bad night (824)
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(570): View more from Pennsylvania

I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him

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(570): I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him http://tfl.nu/0mnm

Replies (2) Good night (972) Bad night (658)
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(707): View more from California

Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful.

(707): View more from California

And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead.

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(707): Oh my god. I slept with my boyfriend last night. It was wonderful. (707): And when I say my boyfriend I mean my electric blanket. Because that's the kind of life I lead. http://tfl.nu/n413

Replies (3) Good night (929) Bad night (408)

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