what if every blade of grass was a penis?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Remind me in the future that chugging dog codeine is not the best idea.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
25 Adults Reveal The Most Embarrassing Stories From When They Were Kids
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.