I made out with a fat chick last night in a hot tub... btw I am breaking up with you
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
My liver is preforming stress tests.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Randomize
