i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
If I get laid dressed as one of the McPoyle twins, I deserve all the medals.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
got into a verbal altercation with Luke Harangoty last night over a table. Called him a cross-eyed fuck and got the table.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
lmao he sent me a snapped but i'm afraid to open.
i think i have dick pic PTSD.
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
