I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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