You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
I would've hung out with you if I had the capacity to do anything besides fall over and pee on things
He burnt his arm on the grill, then turned around and started blaming it on the burger buns...I think it's safe to say he's drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
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