All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
