Your tits are I can't wait for
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
We drove around last night shotting fireworks out the window while they had sex in the back of his car
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
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