The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Hi I am too sober and out of rum. Translation: I owe you some beer. Also, get better taste in beer.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
