I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
Level of drunkenness: just now when I sat down on the toilet, I had to double check to make sure I wasn't sitting on somebody's lap.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
I don't want to hear about you making out with a high schooler. I just had the best sex of my life. My face and arms went numb in the middle of it.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
