I'm peeing chunks and puking liquid. Did I at least have fun last night?
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
Someone somewhere has a picture of me vomiting in a bus stop trash can while a drag queen held my hair for me.
Pride claims another victim
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Puke-y regrets or just things-seem-far-away regrets?
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
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