If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize
