when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
