if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I don't deserve a penis
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
The only thing that got me through this hellish day was imagining a large Swedish penis inside of me.
What did your vagina DO during the nhl lockout?!
Americans.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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