This girl is more easily done than said...
lets hang out tonight and do stupid stuff.
Dating you for 6 months was stupid enough. But thanks.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Who says no to sex and donuts?!
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
You ruined a cute cat because your lack of horniness
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Randomize
