i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
doing squats while I brush my teeth.. gotta keep the booty in check
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
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