make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
My ex best friend's ex fuck buddy is visiting. There was no other option but day drinking.
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
Randomize
