I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
Only a mothe r could love this liver
Banned from zoo.
Again?
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize