Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
My dinner guests were so drunk they never realized that I inadvertantly put Frosted Mini Wheats on the salad instead of crutons.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize