Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Randomize
