one might say we're banned from that church
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
when your friendship is based on dead babies and vodka there is a delicate balance. lesson learned. for what its worth, you are still my number one.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
Randomize
