I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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