Dude she looked like Jerry Garcia's knuckles
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
