And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
all I remember the next morning was crawling through the doggy door and finding my underwear in my purse
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
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