Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I just gagged from thinking about the amount of tequila we will be drinking. DRUNK TUESDAYS
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Just stuck all that extra cocaine money we made in a savings account...like a responsible adult..
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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