The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
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