the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just want him to go down on me while I eat a burger. Is that too much to ask?
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
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