Screwed.edu
shotgunning a bud heavy is like shotgunning a turkey sandwich
I was like, "um, that's my butthole."
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
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