Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
Update: drank half a bottle of Bourbon and texted three ex's. Waiting for the roommates to go to sleep so I can raid the fridge.
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