Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
Randomize
