hell yes lets make some ravioli
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Randomize
