Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
Still had our rainbow strip poker new years tradition. End of night we were only wearing mask.
Did you get the usual surprise pics from the strange straight you like to sprinkle in.
Randomize
