I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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