Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Walked home this morning with my contacts in a shot glass.
First class.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Throwing up in his bed is not a step up in your relationship
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
