Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
the cashier at the gas station pulled a twig out of my hair and told me I should probably wash it before work....it was kinda sweet.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
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