Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Your mom has a birthmark right next to her nipple
you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
Randomize
