And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
Every single piece. I examined every single square inch of this peanut butter and jelly sandwich. and fell in love with every inch. that high.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
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i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
... thanks for letting me perform minor surgery on myself last night.
I figured if you were smart enough to sterilize with vodka, you could handle it.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
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My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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