i don't like sucking hair
oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
Randomize