Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my mom just called me into her room and showed me a condom wrapper she found in my room. "Oh that's from when I was like 16." I don't think that was very comforting.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
So I saw the nuva ring just lying on the counter at Planned Parenthood...did u know it's just a ring? I could go to the Dollar tree buy a plastic bracelet and shove it up there instead.
You do that. Then go have lots of unprotected with your harem of booty calls and see how that works out for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
Girl re-adjusts bra, no one bats an eye. I re-adjust nuts, everyone stares.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize