Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
No matter how drunk I am, I will take the time to wipe a pube off the toilet seat.
i'm really high, and this is sooooooooooo important. how many frosties does it take to fill a bathtub?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
I did way too many drugs this past week for having a broken nose #commitment
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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