Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Drunk is not a location!
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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