she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
the best part is that i get to keep the pot plants and he still has my name tattooed on his ass
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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