I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.