I think I am morally bankrupt
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Oh well, he'll live. He has a hand and a penis.
Randomize
